Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
is that a dick in a sweater?
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
