is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
