there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Randomize
