It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
