I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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