I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
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