Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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