It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
Do you remember whose house we're in?
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
