Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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