If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
