no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize