Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Randomize
