is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Randomize