..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
