handjob tips. give me some.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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