he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Randomize
