I want to walk on stilts...naked
I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
