weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Randomize
