I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
