Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Just puked most of my soul out..
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
