You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
Hey, dude, is Kevin still passed out on your porch?
Yeah. I'm gonna go leave a pitcher of bloody mary next to him in case he's still alive.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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