I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Randomize