Swine flu. Run for my life!
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
