my soul wont recognize me after tonight
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
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