I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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