4 words: hood of his car
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
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