we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
