How'd it feel making her break her religion?
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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