omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
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