You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
Randomize
