I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
