Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Randomize
