Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
Randomize
