and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
