At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
