I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
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