he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
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