she takes plan B like it's going out of style
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize
