Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Randomize
