Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Randomize
