Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
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