sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize