He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize