can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Randomize
