I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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