I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
