fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
