remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Randomize