Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
I enjoy the company of your penis
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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