I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Randomize