walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
